One Thousand Gifts (3)

holy experience

I'm having one of those days - when I feel like I'm not good enough. I wish I were a better mother, a more responsible mother. I wish I were a better wife, responding to my husband with love and understanding. I wish I were a better housekeeper, keeping the house spic and span. I wish I were more chic so that my home would have more character in terms of design and decor. I wish I were so much more than I am right now. I wish I were more fit and active. But I am not. And I need to accept myself for the good that I have inside and the good I can give to others. And I wish other people will accept me and love me regardless of whether I meet their expectations of not. But I have no control over that. While that makes me sad... really really sad, I am pushing myself to see the good in my life and focus on that. Despite the hurt I have in my heart, I want to be thankful to God because He has blessed me beyond what I deserve. And so I continue with my quest to list a thousand gifts. I've made it to 40 so far. Let's see how many more I can add today.

41. School books that I can share with students who will be able to make use of them in the Philippines.
42. I was asked to take graduation pictures during the homeschool graduation mass last Thursday.
43. And I was given a $15 Target GC for my services!
44. The Lakers back-to-back championship
45. Summer vacation is upon us!!!
46. foot massage
47. my parents are in good health despite their advancing years
48. DS expressed his interest to be homeschooled
49. building friendships with other homeschooling moms
50. encouraging stories from other homeschooling families
51. my sweet sweet DD3 who peppers me with questions alongside hugs and kisses
52. how God teaches me lessons through DD3
53. this blog post that has put tears in my eyes and a yearning to be more like the mother God wants me to be
54. emotional and spiritual healing for a dear someone has begun
55. exciting times ahead for SIL
56. Facebook
57. fieldtrip to Amy's Farm
58. Lord's Day celebrations with the family
59. DS is now a Webelo
60. the girls memorizing Scripture verses because of their Little Flowers activities