Learning to Respect Each of Our Children

Learning to Respect Each of Our Children

Do you respect and accept each of your children?
Is that an odd question? Of course, you respect, love and accept your children, right? What kind of parent does not?

But I ask it again ... do you really respect and accept each child as a unique person, separate from you?

I came into parenting armed with my Psychology degree and years of experience as a preschool teacher. I readied myself by reading parenting books. I was bent on getting it right. I knew at the back of my head that I was not going to be perfect but I was going to make sure I followed all the rules so that my child grows up to be a mature God-fearing person.

Well, 4 children later, I have realized that parenting is not about following a set of rules. Effective and fruitful parenting is about being good stewards of these gifts God has entrusted to us. The only set rule we are asked to follow is that we raise them in God's ways, leading them towards a path of holiness. Just as each child is unique, so is God's will and plan for each one. With that in mind, what works for one child may or may not work for the next.

I think this is where it becomes difficult sometimes - when God's will and plan differ from your own will and plan for your child. And to be good parents, we are to subordinate our wills and plans to those of God's. Parenting is such a huge responsibility. Sometimes, I wilt at the thought of it all. But then I think that maybe God gave me my children because He knows that I can be the parent each of these children need.

I was recently put in a small predicament about something that could affect one of my children's future. Yeah, it sound ominous. LOL. It isn't. But still, DH and I needed to make a decision that I knew would in one way or the other affect my child. It was a difficult one. It wasn't something I had not foreseen I would face. So, we prayed. We asked for opinions. I researched. And prayed some more. And though we've made a decision already, I can't help but wonder if I had made the right decision for my child. DH says I should stop. We had done our best. We have to trust that we made the right decision. And since we tried our best to seek the Lord's will, we need to trust that He will not allow us to make the wrong choice.

Why does parenting have to be difficult?!